Don't you hate when your kids do this?

Check out the following scenario. Does this ever happen to you? And isn’t it the MOST ANNOYING thing ever?

SCENE 1

 

 

It’s a normal Saturday morning. You and your husband are just hanging out, looking like Donny & Marie Osmond. You’re wearing your outrageously tight Tweety Bird outfit and you’re trying a new hairstyle. Your husband is sporting his favorite tuxedo with yellow vest. Business as usual.

 

SCENE 2

 

Somewhere in the house, your two kids are concocting a plan. A dastardly plan. “Let’s run into the room and jump on top of mom and dad,” the oldest one says. The little one lights up. “Yes!” she answers. “We’ll  surprise them and jump right onto their heads!”

 

It is not the first time the kids have concocted this plan. And it won’t be the last. Still, they are beyond excited, and they sneak down the hall to carry out their attack.

 

SCENE 3

 

 

You and your husband sense that something bad is about to happen.

 

SCENE 4

 

 

Ooomf! The kids knock the wind out of you and flatten you to the ground. You know they are small and young, but when they barrel into you, it feels like they are 100 times their normal size and strength. It feels like this picture.

 

SCENE 5

 

 

The kids gleefully and maniacally laugh, thinking this is the funniest thing EVER in the history of ever. You and your husband struggle to regain consciousness.

 

LATER...

 

 

Later, punishment is rendered and you Google “broken neck” to try and diagnose your symptoms. Will you be in a full body cast tomorrow? TBD. But the one thing you do know is that this is sure to happen again. And again. And again.

 

The other thing you know is that you should retire that Tweety Bird outfit. Maybe shoot for something a little more age appropriate.